If being a modern-day woman looks like being a man, then I don't want it.
“A woman’s highest calling is to lead a man to his soul, so as to unite him with Source. Her lowest calling is to seduce, separating man from his soul and leave him aimlessly wandering.
A man’s highest calling is to protect woman, so she is free to walk the earth unharmed. Man’s lowest calling is to ambush and force his way into the life of a woman.”
―Cherokee Proverb
This is an exploration of feminine-masculine / yin-yang energy, the imbalance of the two energies in the individual and in society, as well as a calling to harmonize these energies within ourselves, in dating, an in society.
The way I see it, feminism has been distorted from the original intention (for women to have equal rights and opportunities) to now be weaponized against women as well as men, leading to a mass abandonment and attack of feminine energy.
I see this so strongly in both finances & dating.
Women feel the need to be hyper-independent, competitive, and are forcing themselves deeper into their masculine because they feel the need to do it all or because they fear being controlled by a man and want to be financially independent as to protect themselves (which is fair, but there is a difference between creating money from fear and the need to protect vs. desire and the need for freedom).
While I believe women have been more accepted, I don’t think feminine nature has been.
So much of what was needed for women to gain respect was to essentially, act like a man.
Be “professional”- leaving emotions at the door, wearing structured clothing, toning down your smile and warmth, leading with logic over passion.
Be “independent”- be the “cool girl,” don’t show your needs, split the bill, let everyone know you don’t need them.
Be “confident”- be an ice queen, always speak your mind, act above everyone, and never admit you’re wrong.
Weird how it's become political and how women are divided into the camp of wanting the soft life and perpetuating the narrative that to be a woman you need to be conventionally, “feminine,” or being in the camp that reflexively parrots the narrative, "you don't need a man! be a strong independent woman!" as if you shouldn’t want a partner and you should be completely fulfilled on your own.
Look, I love women who are strong, independent, happy, healthy, and successful.
AND I see so many women operate from a constant state of fight or flight because they feel unsafe to slow down and conflate that with strength.
I’ve seen so many women feel ashamed that they want a boyfriend, to get married, or have children (especially if they’re in their 20s) because other people believe that a relationship would hold them back that marriage is a trap, and that you give up your life after having children.
I’ve seen so many women feel like they have to be happily single, when their secret desire is to be happily in love.
While the new wave of feminism have been necessary to create financial and political liberation for women, today the lesson is not for women to solely “fight the power,” but rather, BE in their power.
As we move into a new age into a more conscious state of being in the Age of Aquarius where every individual is being called to wake up to their power, their true nature, and their unique purpose in order to liberate our souls.
To rebalance the collective’s energy, the feminine nature needs to return home, be seen, and be safe to “be” in their power and soften.
Just because a women can do what men can do does not mean that all women should, needs to, nor wants to.
We've all seen more than enough proof of the incredible power women have and the versatility of their skillsets.
But why should I, as a woman that has masculine and feminine energy within her, choose to dishonor my femininity by forcing myself into more of my masculinity than natural?
For the sake of not wanting to be perceived a certain way by society or by individuals who do not understand me who do not care for me who do not want to truly love me?
For the sake of my own ego and pride?
To feed the wounded masculine within myself that holds the illusion that I am not enough if I am not doing it all by myself?
Trust me— I have a lot of natural masculine energy (thanks to my Capricorn Venus, Virgo Moon, and penetrating Projector energy) and I’m done with leading my life with it.
Women have also been chastised by men labeled as gold diggers or disingenuous if they want some thing a slight as a man to pay for a first date, or if they do not believe in the nature of 50-50 relationships- whether because they intend to be mothers or they see the truth that finances isn't the most valuable resource in a relationship, and they contribute in a myriad of other valuable ways.
(Note: Fully acknowledging and honoring the feminine qualities of: love, trust, nurture, care, patience, intuition, softness, curiosity, collaboration, joy, play, passion, compassion, wildness, and freedom MUST be adopted by men and women in order to break out of the industrialization of relationships in modern time.)
The exploitation of feminine nature has led to the corruption of our spirits in our societies, and because of this so many of us live in the vibration of fear, scarcity, distrust, and selfishness.
Masculine energy allows us to feel protected.
Feminine energy allows us to relax into safety.
Just like how a room full of guns doesn’t make you feel safe, neither does someone telling you, “it’s going to be okay” when you’re staring into the eyes of a wolf without anything to defend yourself.
We need both working together.
Unfortunately, the rejection of the feminine energy within individuals as well as a society has led to competition over collaboration that has led to women competing with each other as well as with men in order for protection and the ability to provide for themselves, leading to this epidemic of loneliness and a lack of nurturing and healing spaces within communities.
Men feel emasculated in the face of more and more awakened women who have come to realize their power to manifest the reality to play the system as it was given to them and have, truthfully, broken the system that a patriarchal society has tried to build to keep them down- now we see some women thriving there are some men have, frankly, become spiteful, lazy, and fearful thus leading to trying to suppress more of the feminine spirit.
We see this as violence against women, violence against men who are connected to their feminine spirit, and violence against communities that do not abide by any specific gender role or label who embrace the polarity that exists within them.
We see this as men and women complaining about the other sex, wanting to control the other sex, wanting to put down the other sex- mind you the very women and men that they wish to be in partnership with and that they want to procreate with- because they have forgotten to be able to see themselves and their ability to rise up to the occasion to better themselves and awaken their souls.
Many men are blind to the situation and do not see how they are equally hurt.
Men do not realize the detrimental effect of distorted feminine energy, and when they are in a wounded masculine energy, it will keep him attracting women who bring out their desire to be mothered, or who he cannot meet her needs and continuously disappoints— ensuring that he never fulfills his potential and ever feels enough.
Men who are unable to escape their lower natures and embrace their feminine energy will fall prey to women who wield femininity as manipulative ways to get a man to do what they want to do, or become predatory and cage women who are unhealed and willingly abandon themselves to save him or try to have him saved her.
Alternatively, those living only in their masculine can become self-absorbed, violent, soulless, and power-hungry. They have the power to build, but no clear purpose or consciousness of what or why they are creating.
This dynamic leads to men and women feeling like they must compete with each other, thus creating distrust and dis-ease.
Without the balanced masculine and feminine energy within each other, two people are unable to engage in healthy conflict and conversation to benefit both parties. Instead we see compromise in the form of sacrifice and negotiation, thus making a relationship feel transactional and breeding resentment.
The focus to break out of this power struggle that perpetuates in individual relationships and on a societal level is by seeing and equally valuing the unique gifts and contributions of the feminine & masculine energies.
We must stop over-relying and over-valuing the masculine qualities and learn how to harmonize both energies within us.
Remember, we have both- you can replace feminine/masculine with yin/yang if that feels better- but just as a mother protecting her children is “masculine” and inherent in women, men also have the “feminine” of getting gooey on the woman he loves that’s inherent to men. Personally, I'm 58% masculine, 42% feminine according to my birth chart.
(notes: masculine qualities include: structure, strategy, decisiveness, analysis, discernment, boundaries, courage, grit, resilience, stoicism, physical labor, negotiation, creation, focus, and willpower.)
In union, these divine masculine and feminine sources meet to powerfully co-create anything they desire with intuitive guidance and pragmatic strategy.
The divine feminine needs to be protected, not controlled nor saved, by both men and women, within humanity, and within society.
Protect the feminine as warriors protect their land, their people, and their divine creatures from outside harm so the land may bear fruit for the tribe, so their people could work, rest, play, and heal safety, so the animal spirits may roam freely and bring their light to the tribe.
The solution is to engage in reciprocal relationship.
Healing happens in community.
And while we can try to do our best on our own, people are the most powerful mirrors we have to reflect our true natures, desires, fears, and wounds.
When a reciprocal relationship exists, it is rooted in mutual respect that has built upon the trust and seeing of the truth of the soul of each individual that is engaged in the relationship rather than what one can “bring to the table,” allowing both parties to collaborate with equal power, have compassion for each other’s needs and desires, and have a coherent shared vision that is fully understood and agreed upon.
(note: this can happen within a romantic union, a friendship, or even a mentor/ coach/ therapist/ healer relationship)
Within an individual, the reciprocity of the masculine giving to the feminine and the feminine receiving from the masculine can be seen in something as simple as you working to create money, and guiding that money to organic food to nourish your body.
Interactions can then move away from an industrial, utilitarian, and transactional structure, and move towards a natural, humanitarian, reciprocal nature where individuals lead, follow, give, and receive through love of the highest divine order.
The pathway to the solution, is individual healing.
A man may lead their life aimlessly with the power to create what they want to but without direction without motivation without balance in their own feminine nature as well as struggle with the seductive need for feminine presence.
A women may forget they have power at all and minimize the incredibly powerful force they hold in their presence, creating an amnesia amongst all of humanity and keeping women in victimhood or learned helplessness, never fulfilling their potential.
The masculine need to learn to master their minds, ascend past their lower natures, and deconstruct the misogyny and patriarchy that they have been conditioned to live in.
The feminine need to master their hearts, ascend past fear to find safety in softening, and learn to slow down so she may listen and receive intuitive wisdom that will guide her and her tribe.
An awakened healed man that is rooted in the divine masculine recognizes that Source/God energy lives within their own feminine energy charging them up to create what they desire.
An awakened healed women understands they are Source/Godess energy themselves and must bear witness to her own divine feminine energy to create with the masculine energy within herself.
Men and women don’t compete with each other, they compliment each other.
In this narrative of men versus women we forget that the original queendom‘s and kingdoms are built upon just that- the union of the divine feminine and a divine masculine to share the burden of leadership and trust upon one another to build something greater, nurture the people, and lead a society through intuition and aligned action into the ever evolving world.